‘Tis The Season For All The Feels
Holidays tend to create a wide range of strong emotions layered with expectations, wishes, and desires. There is this build up to holidays with candle lighting, decorating, music playing, meal sharing, and gift giving.
According to a 2017 report, 90% of Americans indicate that they celebrate Christmas. There is evidence to support the shift or expansion of Christmas being more of a cultural holiday than religious for many generations and individuals.
Christmas may be celebrated for religious purposes, cultural purposes, or both; or perhaps you don’t celebrate at all. For any individual caught up in the hustle and bustle of Holiday cheer and gift purchasing and giving there is undoubtedly a sense of loss when the gifts are all unwrapped and the trees are moved to the curb outside. We spend months preparing for this magical day that flies by. The intense build-up the fleeting reality of the day come and go just as any other day. For some within the joyousness, or outside of the joy you may feel a sense of loss, grief, and loneliness during this time of the year. You’re not alone. Holidays and pressures from societal expectations provide a visual of what this season should look like, and should feel like. It’s okay to miss someone who is no longer in your life, it’s okay to cry, it’s okay to feel sad on a Holiday. It’s also okay to have a potpourri of feelings.
During this time of togetherness and festivity your system is hit with a surplus of emotion including the release of dopamine and endorphins in the brain known to occur during the exchange of gift giving and receiving. Dopamine and endorphins make us feel good so after a huge dopamine and endorphin rush like Christmas, it may be expected to feel what one may refer to as a happiness hangover. To make the emotions from Christmas more complex and entangled, the tradition of spending time with loved ones results in boosted oxytocin levels in the brain, oxytocin is known as the cuddle hormone. To add some counterbalance, if you don’t find comfort from being around family or loved ones, or perhaps it’s a mixed experience then you may have a sprinkling of cortisol running around inside of you making you feel stressed along with these positives.
How can you combat the post-Christmas slump and avoid anticipation that will likely pull you away from the good stuff this season?
Allow yourself to set healthy boundaries, whatever that needs to look like for YOU.
Examples: don’t send a christmas card this year, do a secret santa to save money, agree to one holiday party instead of 3, bake two dozen cookies instead of four dozen.
Remember to maintain self-care.
Examples: keep menu planning, continue your exercise regime, take that bubbly bath with a glass of wine and Annie Lenox playing in the background, go on a walk with your dog.
Live in the moment, as much as you are able to.
Examples: take photos, journal, put your phone away, play a game in addition to watching Elf.
Plan for fun small moments after the Holiday season has passed so you can have something to look forward to.
Examples: plan a staycation, schedule a friend game night, set some achievable goals and action steps to attain those goals.
Schedule a session with your therapist, process through all the ups, downs, and in-between.
Look at pictures of Baby Yoda